When he was one year old, he started to learn to walk and follow instructions. He would look into our faces and point his tiny finger on our eyes, nose and mouth. Then he would laugh so hard when we would tickle him. He was like every little child. And I used to jokingly wish that he would not grow up so fast. But I guess I shouldn't have wished for something that silly because I actually got it. I know he will read this when he will finally grow up and understand the world. While we are eagerly waiting for that, everyone, let me tell you a about my cute nephew Kiking, who will forever be our little boy.
Bad! Bad! Bad!
He was okay or "pretty normal" during the first three years of his life. I remember hearing him speak words and communicating to the people around him. He even shouted "Bad! Bad! Bad!", clearly articulating the word when he saw the facial skeleton in G.I. Joe Rise of the Cobra. His mother had to leave the cinema and accompany him outside because he would not stop crying after that. Going back, I fear that that was the reason why he is acting the way he is right now. The movie house in Gaisano Mall Cagayan de Oro allowed a three year old like him to enter the cinema. They said it was okay. But after watching the movie, I assessed that it was indeed hard to understand for a very young child. Even Basty, my other nephew who was already 9 years old during that time, looked terrified in some scenes and my mum and me needed to explain some situations to him after the movie.
But a psychologist told us recently that Kiking's regression was normal for a boy with "special conditions". If you have not guessed yet, Kiking has a condition called mild autism and ADHD. And usually boys like this would seem okay until he reaches three to five years old.
Mooooooon
I was happy during that Christmas a year after the G.I. Joe scene. I asked my family to celebrate the special season with me in Davao City. There was no trouble having Kiking travel an 8 hour ride from Cagayan de Oro to Davao City. For some reason, he was always behaved in air conditioned vehicles. Yes he would shout loud and make some baby noise when in jeepneys, but with aircon buses and taxi cabs, he would stay put and even easily dose off.
In Davao, I would hear him say "Moon!", pointing at the sky when we would walk at my small backyard at night. He would stay up at night even if the rest of the family were already sleepy. Mum said she was worried for her grandson because he had trouble recognizing queues yet. Kiking did not seem to know the difference between day time and sleeping time. Later in CDO, we noticed that he did not distinguish the bed from the floor, too, because he would lie down on the floor all the time. And he even lost his speech. Moon was his last word talked properly. He would just utter sounds that did not mean anything --at least for most people like us.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
It was a very painful ordeal admitting that Kiking, my very cute and handsome nephew, had a serious problem. You can imagine how hard it was for me and my twin sister to convince my parents and Kiking's mother to have him checked by a professional child psychologist. But it happened and soon what we suspected was confirmed by the doctor. Our fears heightened but we could not express it for the sake of Kiking.
My family especially my dad, mum and Kiking's sister became very serious about helping Kiking overcome her condition. My mum would gather as much information she can about autism and adhd. She even bought a book. After enrolling our little boy to an occupational therapist, we learned a new way to tell Kiking that the floor was not for sleeping. We were told that if Kiking would lie on the floor, we should hold his hand and slowly pull him up to signal that he should stand up. And while carefully pulling Kiking up, we must count 1 to 10. By ten, he should be up. We were also told that if he would stand up earlier than 10, that should be a sign of development.
Special Education
Occupational therapy for autistic children is expensive in the Philippines. We learned that the hard way or 800pesos per session kind of way. The first sessions Kiking experienced were at a clinic near the neighborhood where he had one on one sessions with a teacher. He did not have any opportunity to mingle with other children. Kiking loved the playhouse there, but that was his only chance of expressing himself. And that cost us much.
Realizing that our little one needed socialization most of all, we got him into another place where he was still required to visit thrice a week. More affordable even if it was still a costly 500 pesos, but it was worth it because Kiking was asked to be around other children, mostly having special conditions of their own, too. Finally, after two years of training, the psychologist assessed that Kiking was ready for school. Off to SPED we went and we did not regret it. Kiking was finally able to develop his behavior. He learned how to visit the loo by himself, eat when it was time and ask for milk when he needed to. More importantly, he learned to communicate using signals. Of course, the usual jumping almost endlessly, stubbornness during eating time and running back and forth was still there, but the improvement was amazing even how slow it was.
Dada! Dada! Didi!
We call our dad, Kiking's grandfather, as daddy but our mum calls him "Dadad". Kiking perhaps heard the word repeatedly more than other words because he eventually learned to utter it, although not as articulate as his favorite word "Didi" or milk. Each time Kiking would request milk, he would point at where the milk was (which would usually be on top of the refrigerator so he could not reach and play it) and then he would call "dada! didi!"
Soon, Kiking knew how to distinguish things especially pictures her mother drew or from educational materials and he showed recognition for graphics from his grandmum's computer games. He would sit beside grandmum and point and point. For an autistic and adhd child, even sitting properly is a problem, so we were always happy to see Kiking stay put. My mum would always update me about the good things that happened to Kiking because I live in Davao. His brother would also share his interest to teach Kiking to talk even if he himself is a very shy kind of boy. Kiking was the family's center of attention. Yes, it wasn't easy but with family support, we never stopped believing that Kiking can talk.
Kiss
After four years of occupational therapy, Kiking, our little boy, continued to become the apple of our eyes. I personally am working hard to continue supporting him and his brother financially. It's never easy, I could not stress more in behalf of my family. But we are always happy and delighted to have Kiking in our life. He continues to surprise us with many new improvements and sweet gestures every time. Last time I visited him, he suddenly hugged me tight and kissed me hard in the cheek. I was shocked and amazed and did an awww in my mind. That was his new way of asking for milk.
Kiking still couldn't talk after about four years from the time he was diagnosed. The development is slow but we are patiently accompanying him throughout the process.
Some people would say that well at least Kiking could make eye contact and point stuff. Others would say that many families who have autistic and adhd children have more difficult situations. They would say that we are better compared to them. But for me, families who have special children in their lives see things in leveled ground without reference to superlatives. No one is better no one is much worse. What matters is only love and that boy or girl who will forever be an angel.
Bad! Bad! Bad!
He was okay or "pretty normal" during the first three years of his life. I remember hearing him speak words and communicating to the people around him. He even shouted "Bad! Bad! Bad!", clearly articulating the word when he saw the facial skeleton in G.I. Joe Rise of the Cobra. His mother had to leave the cinema and accompany him outside because he would not stop crying after that. Going back, I fear that that was the reason why he is acting the way he is right now. The movie house in Gaisano Mall Cagayan de Oro allowed a three year old like him to enter the cinema. They said it was okay. But after watching the movie, I assessed that it was indeed hard to understand for a very young child. Even Basty, my other nephew who was already 9 years old during that time, looked terrified in some scenes and my mum and me needed to explain some situations to him after the movie.
But a psychologist told us recently that Kiking's regression was normal for a boy with "special conditions". If you have not guessed yet, Kiking has a condition called mild autism and ADHD. And usually boys like this would seem okay until he reaches three to five years old.
Mooooooon
I was happy during that Christmas a year after the G.I. Joe scene. I asked my family to celebrate the special season with me in Davao City. There was no trouble having Kiking travel an 8 hour ride from Cagayan de Oro to Davao City. For some reason, he was always behaved in air conditioned vehicles. Yes he would shout loud and make some baby noise when in jeepneys, but with aircon buses and taxi cabs, he would stay put and even easily dose off.
In Davao, I would hear him say "Moon!", pointing at the sky when we would walk at my small backyard at night. He would stay up at night even if the rest of the family were already sleepy. Mum said she was worried for her grandson because he had trouble recognizing queues yet. Kiking did not seem to know the difference between day time and sleeping time. Later in CDO, we noticed that he did not distinguish the bed from the floor, too, because he would lie down on the floor all the time. And he even lost his speech. Moon was his last word talked properly. He would just utter sounds that did not mean anything --at least for most people like us.
 |
| Kiking in Davao on our way to Samal Island. December 2009 |
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
It was a very painful ordeal admitting that Kiking, my very cute and handsome nephew, had a serious problem. You can imagine how hard it was for me and my twin sister to convince my parents and Kiking's mother to have him checked by a professional child psychologist. But it happened and soon what we suspected was confirmed by the doctor. Our fears heightened but we could not express it for the sake of Kiking.
My family especially my dad, mum and Kiking's sister became very serious about helping Kiking overcome her condition. My mum would gather as much information she can about autism and adhd. She even bought a book. After enrolling our little boy to an occupational therapist, we learned a new way to tell Kiking that the floor was not for sleeping. We were told that if Kiking would lie on the floor, we should hold his hand and slowly pull him up to signal that he should stand up. And while carefully pulling Kiking up, we must count 1 to 10. By ten, he should be up. We were also told that if he would stand up earlier than 10, that should be a sign of development.
Special Education
Occupational therapy for autistic children is expensive in the Philippines. We learned that the hard way or 800pesos per session kind of way. The first sessions Kiking experienced were at a clinic near the neighborhood where he had one on one sessions with a teacher. He did not have any opportunity to mingle with other children. Kiking loved the playhouse there, but that was his only chance of expressing himself. And that cost us much.
Realizing that our little one needed socialization most of all, we got him into another place where he was still required to visit thrice a week. More affordable even if it was still a costly 500 pesos, but it was worth it because Kiking was asked to be around other children, mostly having special conditions of their own, too. Finally, after two years of training, the psychologist assessed that Kiking was ready for school. Off to SPED we went and we did not regret it. Kiking was finally able to develop his behavior. He learned how to visit the loo by himself, eat when it was time and ask for milk when he needed to. More importantly, he learned to communicate using signals. Of course, the usual jumping almost endlessly, stubbornness during eating time and running back and forth was still there, but the improvement was amazing even how slow it was.
Dada! Dada! Didi!
We call our dad, Kiking's grandfather, as daddy but our mum calls him "Dadad". Kiking perhaps heard the word repeatedly more than other words because he eventually learned to utter it, although not as articulate as his favorite word "Didi" or milk. Each time Kiking would request milk, he would point at where the milk was (which would usually be on top of the refrigerator so he could not reach and play it) and then he would call "dada! didi!"
Soon, Kiking knew how to distinguish things especially pictures her mother drew or from educational materials and he showed recognition for graphics from his grandmum's computer games. He would sit beside grandmum and point and point. For an autistic and adhd child, even sitting properly is a problem, so we were always happy to see Kiking stay put. My mum would always update me about the good things that happened to Kiking because I live in Davao. His brother would also share his interest to teach Kiking to talk even if he himself is a very shy kind of boy. Kiking was the family's center of attention. Yes, it wasn't easy but with family support, we never stopped believing that Kiking can talk.
Kiss
After four years of occupational therapy, Kiking, our little boy, continued to become the apple of our eyes. I personally am working hard to continue supporting him and his brother financially. It's never easy, I could not stress more in behalf of my family. But we are always happy and delighted to have Kiking in our life. He continues to surprise us with many new improvements and sweet gestures every time. Last time I visited him, he suddenly hugged me tight and kissed me hard in the cheek. I was shocked and amazed and did an awww in my mind. That was his new way of asking for milk.
Kiking still couldn't talk after about four years from the time he was diagnosed. The development is slow but we are patiently accompanying him throughout the process.
Some people would say that well at least Kiking could make eye contact and point stuff. Others would say that many families who have autistic and adhd children have more difficult situations. They would say that we are better compared to them. But for me, families who have special children in their lives see things in leveled ground without reference to superlatives. No one is better no one is much worse. What matters is only love and that boy or girl who will forever be an angel.
I admire you and your family for really going all out for Kiking. He is a blessed child because of your support.
ReplyDeleteKiking is a wonderful child. I really admire the support you are all giving for Kiking. :)
ReplyDelete